Well, today looks like it will be one that requires lots of patience and calm reflection on what has previously worked! Jamison has decided to wake at 2.5 hours and scream until I gave in and fed him at 3 hours. Here is me wanting to transition from 3.5 hours, and he wants to go backwards!!! I am hoping that it is because we have been pretty inconsistent lately since Christmas celebrations. I think I need to go back to my proven method of improving things of leaving him to rest and going in every 10 minutes if he is crying gustily. I am so tired today that I don't really have the stamina to deal with the crying, which I know doesn't help.
Thank goodness I can look back on worse times in Jamison's early weeks and know that phases are just that - phases. This will pass. I just so often doubt myself when things go wrong and I suppose that is unnecessarily placing blame on myself for something that is uncontrollable to a certain extent.
Well, here I go, with a prayer and a deep breath, knowing that all things are possible! =)
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
That glorified 4 hourly routine!
I have been doing some research into when it is appropriate to move to a 4 hour routine. Every mum I speak to tells me how great it is! I was so eager to move to 4 hourly soon, but having read the signs that a baby is ready, I have decided to not rush and wait for Jamison to be ready.
Signs I will be looking for to start to transition:
I would suspect that if he starts being able to go longer at some times of the day, but not others, that he is close to being ready. At the moment, Jamison seems to alternate whether he sleeps well for his first nap of the day. I am going to look to see if this is a putting down to bed timing issue or not.
For now, I am going to remind myself to not feel pressure to move to a 4 hourly as my success as a parent is not depending on it.
Something wonderful that I read:
Can't wait though!
Signs I will be looking for to start to transition:
- Sleeping through the night (i.e. over 10 hours, 12 is best)
- He is comfortable doing 5 feedings during the day
- Needing to wake him for his feeds. I will use this as the main indicator, as good sleeping means he is feeding well and is not hungry, obviously.
- When he starts showing less interest in feeding when feeding every 3.5 hours.
I would suspect that if he starts being able to go longer at some times of the day, but not others, that he is close to being ready. At the moment, Jamison seems to alternate whether he sleeps well for his first nap of the day. I am going to look to see if this is a putting down to bed timing issue or not.
For now, I am going to remind myself to not feel pressure to move to a 4 hourly as my success as a parent is not depending on it.
Something wonderful that I read:
There is no rush. It is lovely to be on four feedings a day, but it is more lovely to be able to enjoy your baby and not stretching and working to get him to go longer between feedings. It is more lovely to not be frustrated because he woke up after sleeping 1.5-2 hours, but it is too early to eat at 4 hours, you know? 4 hours will happen. Remember, don't measure your success by whether or not your baby is on a 4 hour schedule. Relax and enjoy the life of your baby.
Can't wait though!
Monday, December 28, 2009
To Cry or Not to Cry
The definition of Crying It Out (or CIO) ranges from person to person. For some, it means putting baby in bed and walking away never to return until baby has slept or nap time is over. Harsh in my opinion. My understanding is that it is a method used to HELP your baby learn to fall asleep. It is not a formula or as straight forward as leave and let cry. That would be heartless. As I have come to know my son, the more I am able to judge if his cry is worth tending to or whether it would be in his best interest to leave him. There will always be occasions where 'rules' will be broken. The process I have used is to help a baby learn to sleep on their own, and the steps a person takes would need to vary from child to child. As a teacher, I learnt that all things are like this - one way does not suit all children, be it because of age, temperament or even the weather!!!!
THE GOAL
Your goal with CIO is for your child to learn to sleep on her own.
It is SO HARD to listen to your baby cry. It put me in tears so many times in the early weeks and I still have my day of tears, but not as frequent as I now know the benefits of this. Jamison went through a stage where for weeks he would wake up after 40-45 minutes of sleep every nap and cry on and off until I finally fed him. It was horrible and hard, but mainly because (as I realise in retrospect) that i was using different methods to calm him and was not consistent.
Don't confuse hard with wrong. There are a lot of things in life we have to do that are hard that bring about great benefits. We have to work out to be in shape. To have a clean house takes work. To be pregnant and labor to deliver a child is hard and takes work. The best things in life are hard to come by!
I think back to that transition week around 2 months where I implemented CIO and remember how hard it was but realize how beneficial it was! In the scheme of Jamison's life, it wasn't that long after all and the benefits were worth the heartache.
CIO EXPECTATIONS
Things are easier to deal with if you have a better idea of what to expect.
* It is hard. Listening to my baby cry is difficult. I have to remind myself that it is normal that it is hard, and that I can accept how difficult it is - I don't think that babywise paints a clear enough picture of this!
* Sticking with it makes it get easier. It was my chopping and changing of routines and methods that caused the choas in the first place!
* It can be a roller coaster. You will have difficult days interspersed with the good days for some time. My biggest break through was when I learnt to think that if Jamison sleeps longer than 45 minutes in any nap time then it is a bonus! But as time went on, the hard days got fewer and farther between. It is hard to accept, but Babies are constantly changing, and we can't expect something to continue working for too long until it needs to be tweaked!
BASIC RULES
Like I said, you will sometimes need to break rules, but here are some basic ones to follow.
* Be Consistent. If you are going to do CIO, I think you need to do CIO for every nap and for bedtime. Doing it at night or just for day time naps is not enough. All or nothing! I don't think you should do CIO at all if you aren't going to stick to it. I remember running to my husband, so stressed, when all I wanted to do was go in there after 1 minute of crying and had to have him remind me to hang in there and wait a bit. If a baby knows they will be "rescued" at some point, they will cry until they are.
Of course, there are times I break this rule. When he is sick, or we are out, or he is overstimulated, or it is a very hot day. These are times when i will do the extra measures to help him fall asleep.
* Be Home. I had to dedicate at least two weeks to staying home as much as possible and getting it worked out.
* Be respectful. If you know you are putting baby down too late, don't do it. The baby will just cry and never go to sleep and you will eventually get baby. That does not work toward meeting your goal.
* Check...or Don't. When doing CIO, I would check on Jamison at some point if he hadn’t gone to sleep. I can see over the cot without him seeing me. It took me a while to figure out Jamison's response to my coming in at different times. Sometimes I can go in there when he first starts crying and tighten the wrap and he will drift back off... other times he will become more awake and protest louder (this is usually when he wakes closer to the next feed!)I also worked out that Jamison would look out for me and not go to sleep if I went in too often.
* Set a Limit. Set a limit you can all deal with. If Jamison had not gone to sleep after 45 minutes I would go in and try to resettle. He always went to sleep initially without much trouble so this is only for the second cycle.
* Keep to the cycle. If Jamison hasn't slept much the last nap and I get him up to feed, I always keep him up for the normal amount of time so that the feed, wake, sleep cycle is still active and we are on track. This is especially important when sleep training.
* Adjust For Context. If baby has been sleeping well for weeks, and suddenly starts crying in the middle of a nap, that would be considered uncharacteristic, and I would go and see what is happening. If all is well and there is no obvious reason for the crying, then CIO if needed.
CIO TIPS
* Discover Optimal Waketime. Get to know the timing of your child's naps. The younger the baby, the more crucial it is to get them down at the right moment. As they get older, down-to-the-minute isn't as important, but get to know your child's cues. This is a hard thing and unfortunately can require some trial and error on your part. Your child should get tired around the same time, Jamison does around the hour mark so i watch him from then on.
If you are following cues and your baby still has a hard time falling asleep, you might need to ignore cues. Those cues might be "too late" cues rather than "just right" cues.
* Swaddle. If your baby will be swaddled, I would do that. Helps them to focus on falling asleep, not sucking or waving!
* Have a Routine. I like to sing the same tune every time once he is in bed. I also rock him briefly until I see him first get drowsy then pop him down. I be careful not to rock much as it can overstimulate babies.
* See the Connection. Overall, everything is connected. The better rested they are, the more awake they will be for eating, and the more they eat, the better they will sleep, and the more they are awake, the more tired they will be for sleeping.
CIO and FUSSY TIME
If your baby is crying because of colic or it is their fussy time of day, this is not the time to do CIO. If you need a break for sanity and need to put baby down for a few minutes, that is fine, but don't try to sleep train a baby who is crying for one of these reasons.
LOOKING BACK
this is my reflection on how Jamison did with CIO at 2 months. It always looks better now than when we did it, but it obviously worked.
* We started CIO at about 9 weeks of age.
* We did it after a time of constant going out and interrupted routine, pretty much since birth. We eventually decided we needed to be fair to him and dedicated to stay home and be consistent for at least a week or two.
* At first, he cried a lot. It was definitely a roller coaster experience in the beginning.
* Within days of starting, he went from waking at every nap after 45 minutes to having one or two if we were lucky that he would sleep through a bit longer.
* After five days, even despite the inconsistencies, he had really improved.
* Once we started being really consistent, he went to just basic fussing for a few minutes before some naps.
* now at nearly four months, if we have timed his wake times well (still working this out)he will go down with just a little grizzle and will sleep up to 2.5 hours and at least 1.5 hours for every nap (with a couple of days where one nap is only 45 minutes long). I consider this wonderful!
Hang in there; just know it gets better. I believe it is best for my baby, but that is obvious because I do it. Do what you think is best for your baby because you are his mum and no one will know better than you do. Have someone to support you through it. That is the only way I coped.
THE GOAL
Your goal with CIO is for your child to learn to sleep on her own.
It is SO HARD to listen to your baby cry. It put me in tears so many times in the early weeks and I still have my day of tears, but not as frequent as I now know the benefits of this. Jamison went through a stage where for weeks he would wake up after 40-45 minutes of sleep every nap and cry on and off until I finally fed him. It was horrible and hard, but mainly because (as I realise in retrospect) that i was using different methods to calm him and was not consistent.
Don't confuse hard with wrong. There are a lot of things in life we have to do that are hard that bring about great benefits. We have to work out to be in shape. To have a clean house takes work. To be pregnant and labor to deliver a child is hard and takes work. The best things in life are hard to come by!
I think back to that transition week around 2 months where I implemented CIO and remember how hard it was but realize how beneficial it was! In the scheme of Jamison's life, it wasn't that long after all and the benefits were worth the heartache.
CIO EXPECTATIONS
Things are easier to deal with if you have a better idea of what to expect.
* It is hard. Listening to my baby cry is difficult. I have to remind myself that it is normal that it is hard, and that I can accept how difficult it is - I don't think that babywise paints a clear enough picture of this!
* Sticking with it makes it get easier. It was my chopping and changing of routines and methods that caused the choas in the first place!
* It can be a roller coaster. You will have difficult days interspersed with the good days for some time. My biggest break through was when I learnt to think that if Jamison sleeps longer than 45 minutes in any nap time then it is a bonus! But as time went on, the hard days got fewer and farther between. It is hard to accept, but Babies are constantly changing, and we can't expect something to continue working for too long until it needs to be tweaked!
BASIC RULES
Like I said, you will sometimes need to break rules, but here are some basic ones to follow.
* Be Consistent. If you are going to do CIO, I think you need to do CIO for every nap and for bedtime. Doing it at night or just for day time naps is not enough. All or nothing! I don't think you should do CIO at all if you aren't going to stick to it. I remember running to my husband, so stressed, when all I wanted to do was go in there after 1 minute of crying and had to have him remind me to hang in there and wait a bit. If a baby knows they will be "rescued" at some point, they will cry until they are.
Of course, there are times I break this rule. When he is sick, or we are out, or he is overstimulated, or it is a very hot day. These are times when i will do the extra measures to help him fall asleep.
* Be Home. I had to dedicate at least two weeks to staying home as much as possible and getting it worked out.
* Be respectful. If you know you are putting baby down too late, don't do it. The baby will just cry and never go to sleep and you will eventually get baby. That does not work toward meeting your goal.
* Check...or Don't. When doing CIO, I would check on Jamison at some point if he hadn’t gone to sleep. I can see over the cot without him seeing me. It took me a while to figure out Jamison's response to my coming in at different times. Sometimes I can go in there when he first starts crying and tighten the wrap and he will drift back off... other times he will become more awake and protest louder (this is usually when he wakes closer to the next feed!)I also worked out that Jamison would look out for me and not go to sleep if I went in too often.
* Set a Limit. Set a limit you can all deal with. If Jamison had not gone to sleep after 45 minutes I would go in and try to resettle. He always went to sleep initially without much trouble so this is only for the second cycle.
* Keep to the cycle. If Jamison hasn't slept much the last nap and I get him up to feed, I always keep him up for the normal amount of time so that the feed, wake, sleep cycle is still active and we are on track. This is especially important when sleep training.
* Adjust For Context. If baby has been sleeping well for weeks, and suddenly starts crying in the middle of a nap, that would be considered uncharacteristic, and I would go and see what is happening. If all is well and there is no obvious reason for the crying, then CIO if needed.
CIO TIPS
* Discover Optimal Waketime. Get to know the timing of your child's naps. The younger the baby, the more crucial it is to get them down at the right moment. As they get older, down-to-the-minute isn't as important, but get to know your child's cues. This is a hard thing and unfortunately can require some trial and error on your part. Your child should get tired around the same time, Jamison does around the hour mark so i watch him from then on.
If you are following cues and your baby still has a hard time falling asleep, you might need to ignore cues. Those cues might be "too late" cues rather than "just right" cues.
* Swaddle. If your baby will be swaddled, I would do that. Helps them to focus on falling asleep, not sucking or waving!
* Have a Routine. I like to sing the same tune every time once he is in bed. I also rock him briefly until I see him first get drowsy then pop him down. I be careful not to rock much as it can overstimulate babies.
* See the Connection. Overall, everything is connected. The better rested they are, the more awake they will be for eating, and the more they eat, the better they will sleep, and the more they are awake, the more tired they will be for sleeping.
CIO and FUSSY TIME
If your baby is crying because of colic or it is their fussy time of day, this is not the time to do CIO. If you need a break for sanity and need to put baby down for a few minutes, that is fine, but don't try to sleep train a baby who is crying for one of these reasons.
LOOKING BACK
this is my reflection on how Jamison did with CIO at 2 months. It always looks better now than when we did it, but it obviously worked.
* We started CIO at about 9 weeks of age.
* We did it after a time of constant going out and interrupted routine, pretty much since birth. We eventually decided we needed to be fair to him and dedicated to stay home and be consistent for at least a week or two.
* At first, he cried a lot. It was definitely a roller coaster experience in the beginning.
* Within days of starting, he went from waking at every nap after 45 minutes to having one or two if we were lucky that he would sleep through a bit longer.
* After five days, even despite the inconsistencies, he had really improved.
* Once we started being really consistent, he went to just basic fussing for a few minutes before some naps.
* now at nearly four months, if we have timed his wake times well (still working this out)he will go down with just a little grizzle and will sleep up to 2.5 hours and at least 1.5 hours for every nap (with a couple of days where one nap is only 45 minutes long). I consider this wonderful!
Hang in there; just know it gets better. I believe it is best for my baby, but that is obvious because I do it. Do what you think is best for your baby because you are his mum and no one will know better than you do. Have someone to support you through it. That is the only way I coped.
combination feeding or not?!
So far on my journey as a parent, there have been so many questions, and areas that I have become so confused about, particularly because every man and his dog has an opinion on how I should parent. One area of confusion has been on routines, and how flexible you can be with feed times etc. One source will tell me that it is ok to have feeds between 3 and 4 hourly as a combination, and another will say that you need to be as consistent as possible. And that is just opinions in the routine camp, let alone the attachment parenting camp!!!
Babywise says a combination is fine, be flexible. I was flexible around 2 months of age and then had to do a strict routine to correct it all! Who knows.
I am slowly realizing that I can aim for 3.5 hourly or whatever it is for this week and try my best, but not worry if it doesn't happen every time. Babies are human after all! =) Consistency as much as possible is what counts.
Babywise says a combination is fine, be flexible. I was flexible around 2 months of age and then had to do a strict routine to correct it all! Who knows.
I am slowly realizing that I can aim for 3.5 hourly or whatever it is for this week and try my best, but not worry if it doesn't happen every time. Babies are human after all! =) Consistency as much as possible is what counts.
Consistency: Creating a schedule
Many Babywise moms find themselves in a schedule where the baby gets up about the same time every day, and they follow the eat/play/sleep pattern, but the times of each nap and each feeding every day vary considerably. I know this has been the pattern of my life for the last few months, as routines have changed over and over, be it from growth spurts, immunizations or my uncertainty of what to do. If asked, "What time does baby take a nap in the afternoon?", I would often respond, "well, it depends on what time he eats in the morning and how long his morning nap was..."
I remember when Jamison was 2 months old and his parents wanted to visit after work at a time when Jamison was awake. I knew that I could say roughly what time I anticipated him to be up, but by the end of the day, so many variables would have come into play, that my times might be totally off! Naptime varied from day to day. It depended on how long his earlier naps lasted and how long he stayed awake. In retrospect, I was on a "pattern" rather than a "schedule."
As he has got older and I have more experience under my belt, I am finding that there is a more predictable routine to where he ate, slept, and played in the same hours every day (minus your typical disruptions). So how do you get there? How do you set a schedule? Here are some hints.
* Pick your first waketime of the day. Depending on your baby, there may need to be some compromise between you two. Some babies are early risers, so mom is going to have to go with that. Others will sleep in a bit and you can choose the waketime better. Jamison has always been an early riser, so 6.30 has been our start time. I have found this helpful as it suits our family, as my husband rises early for work and I might as well get up! It also suits us for heading out mid morning if we need to. Your waketime is up to you (and baby). There is no right or wrong time. Keep in mind the number of feedings you want to get in and the bedtime you want so you can get the necessary feedings in before bedtime.
* Pick your bedtime. Bedtime should fall naturally based on your schedule. Bedtime should be 10-12 hours before waketime. Jamison's bedtime is 6:30 at the moment. Some times this is flexible, depending on his need for earlier feeds on some occasions in the afternoon.
* Once you have those two things picked out, stay consistent. I set my alarm so I can get baby up on time. I try to be home in time in the evening to get baby down for bedtime. Remember, your schedule serves you, but it won't serve you if you completely ignore it--it will have nothing to serve! Sure, you can have days when you sleep in. You can have nights you all go to a friend's house and get home a little late. Just keep these as the exceptions rather than the rule. In comparison to your lifetime, your children are not young for very long. I find that there are ways of keeping to routine as much as possible while out and about - I always pop Jamison down to sleep at the same bed time in the porta cot when out.
* Next, pick your feeding times. This decision might vary from your original goal after some evaluation. When Jamison was first born, I did a 3 hour routine that he slotted into beautifully. I started him at 7 AM. My original goal was a 7:00 feeding, a 10:00 feeding, and a 1:00 feeding. At first, it worked great. After a few weeks, however, he started to need to eat early sometimes in the morning. I was confused about whether to go with the pattern of when my baby was most hungry or to stick to the clock. But parent directed feeding calls for judgement in light of both. If he was hungry - i would feed him! Simple. However, his feeding did seem to slot into the 3 hours as we continued to do it. Flexiblity is important I have found, learning to not be ruled by the clock.
* Watch waketime length. This will depend on your child. Each child is different. I only have to talk to my friends with little ones to realise this! Sometimes different times of day will have different waketimes by a bit, and that is okay. Wake time will gradually increase as bub gets older. I increase wake times by 5 minutes bit by bit, as I notice that he is not as tired when nap time comes.
* Next, figure out naptimes. By this I mean the time baby will go down for a nap. This will be dependent on a couple of things. One is how long baby can successfully stay awake. This means happily. It also means baby goes down for a nap and the crying (or lack thereof) is consistent and naptime length is appropriate. Another thing it is dependent on is the amount of time before the next feeding. Depending on your schedule, baby will sleep anywhere from 1-2.5 hours. I have found that there is a delicate balance of when to put bub down so that he is tired enough, but not too tired. Too early or too late usually results in lots more crying!
* Finally, and again, stay consistent. Remember that it is dynamic and will change as your baby gets older. Whatever schedule you are on, stay consistent. If you eat at the same time every day, you get hungry at the same time every day. If you go to bed at the same time every night, you get tired then. If you wake up at the same time every morning, your body does so without an alarm clock. Consistency pays off. You want to go by the time on clock as well as the hours that have past. If baby slept in that morning and ate a little later, work to get on the normal schedule by afternoon. Of course, we always are flexible and adjust the schedule as necessary when baby is in a growth spurt or is otherwise hungry.
Can you be a mum who says, "My baby naps at 1:00" with confidence and honesty? Yes! It will take time and consistency. I would commit to staying home for a week or two and really nailing the schedule down. You don't have to completely shut yourself in, but try to stay in and keep in mind you are helping baby get stabilized. I had to do this with Jamison around the 2 month mark, has he had become very unsettled. A strict 3 hour routine for 5 days was hard at first, but really settled him down and he has responded well ever since. It also helped with the unsettled 45 minute naps!!
I remember when Jamison was 2 months old and his parents wanted to visit after work at a time when Jamison was awake. I knew that I could say roughly what time I anticipated him to be up, but by the end of the day, so many variables would have come into play, that my times might be totally off! Naptime varied from day to day. It depended on how long his earlier naps lasted and how long he stayed awake. In retrospect, I was on a "pattern" rather than a "schedule."
As he has got older and I have more experience under my belt, I am finding that there is a more predictable routine to where he ate, slept, and played in the same hours every day (minus your typical disruptions). So how do you get there? How do you set a schedule? Here are some hints.
* Pick your first waketime of the day. Depending on your baby, there may need to be some compromise between you two. Some babies are early risers, so mom is going to have to go with that. Others will sleep in a bit and you can choose the waketime better. Jamison has always been an early riser, so 6.30 has been our start time. I have found this helpful as it suits our family, as my husband rises early for work and I might as well get up! It also suits us for heading out mid morning if we need to. Your waketime is up to you (and baby). There is no right or wrong time. Keep in mind the number of feedings you want to get in and the bedtime you want so you can get the necessary feedings in before bedtime.
* Pick your bedtime. Bedtime should fall naturally based on your schedule. Bedtime should be 10-12 hours before waketime. Jamison's bedtime is 6:30 at the moment. Some times this is flexible, depending on his need for earlier feeds on some occasions in the afternoon.
* Once you have those two things picked out, stay consistent. I set my alarm so I can get baby up on time. I try to be home in time in the evening to get baby down for bedtime. Remember, your schedule serves you, but it won't serve you if you completely ignore it--it will have nothing to serve! Sure, you can have days when you sleep in. You can have nights you all go to a friend's house and get home a little late. Just keep these as the exceptions rather than the rule. In comparison to your lifetime, your children are not young for very long. I find that there are ways of keeping to routine as much as possible while out and about - I always pop Jamison down to sleep at the same bed time in the porta cot when out.
* Next, pick your feeding times. This decision might vary from your original goal after some evaluation. When Jamison was first born, I did a 3 hour routine that he slotted into beautifully. I started him at 7 AM. My original goal was a 7:00 feeding, a 10:00 feeding, and a 1:00 feeding. At first, it worked great. After a few weeks, however, he started to need to eat early sometimes in the morning. I was confused about whether to go with the pattern of when my baby was most hungry or to stick to the clock. But parent directed feeding calls for judgement in light of both. If he was hungry - i would feed him! Simple. However, his feeding did seem to slot into the 3 hours as we continued to do it. Flexiblity is important I have found, learning to not be ruled by the clock.
* Watch waketime length. This will depend on your child. Each child is different. I only have to talk to my friends with little ones to realise this! Sometimes different times of day will have different waketimes by a bit, and that is okay. Wake time will gradually increase as bub gets older. I increase wake times by 5 minutes bit by bit, as I notice that he is not as tired when nap time comes.
* Next, figure out naptimes. By this I mean the time baby will go down for a nap. This will be dependent on a couple of things. One is how long baby can successfully stay awake. This means happily. It also means baby goes down for a nap and the crying (or lack thereof) is consistent and naptime length is appropriate. Another thing it is dependent on is the amount of time before the next feeding. Depending on your schedule, baby will sleep anywhere from 1-2.5 hours. I have found that there is a delicate balance of when to put bub down so that he is tired enough, but not too tired. Too early or too late usually results in lots more crying!
* Finally, and again, stay consistent. Remember that it is dynamic and will change as your baby gets older. Whatever schedule you are on, stay consistent. If you eat at the same time every day, you get hungry at the same time every day. If you go to bed at the same time every night, you get tired then. If you wake up at the same time every morning, your body does so without an alarm clock. Consistency pays off. You want to go by the time on clock as well as the hours that have past. If baby slept in that morning and ate a little later, work to get on the normal schedule by afternoon. Of course, we always are flexible and adjust the schedule as necessary when baby is in a growth spurt or is otherwise hungry.
Can you be a mum who says, "My baby naps at 1:00" with confidence and honesty? Yes! It will take time and consistency. I would commit to staying home for a week or two and really nailing the schedule down. You don't have to completely shut yourself in, but try to stay in and keep in mind you are helping baby get stabilized. I had to do this with Jamison around the 2 month mark, has he had become very unsettled. A strict 3 hour routine for 5 days was hard at first, but really settled him down and he has responded well ever since. It also helped with the unsettled 45 minute naps!!
Consistency: Starting the Day
Many people, not just my usual sources of parenting advice, suggest that you start your day with baby at a consistent time. Trying to stick to a flexible routine of 3 or 4 hourly feeds with a routine that allows you to know what you are doing for the day is easier when you start at the same time if possible.
Confusion arises when your child can't quite make it through the night and consistently wakes when the birds do. What do you do? How do you start the day? What time?
Refer to Babywise and you will see that it is best to start each day at the same time within 30 minutes. Lets say it is 6.30 which is our usual start time. You need to start each day at 6.30, or within 30 minutes of 6.30. This means from 6.15 to 6.45, or 6.30 to 7.
A consistent wake time helps to move towards sleeping through the night.
Confusion arises when your child can't quite make it through the night and consistently wakes when the birds do. What do you do? How do you start the day? What time?
Refer to Babywise and you will see that it is best to start each day at the same time within 30 minutes. Lets say it is 6.30 which is our usual start time. You need to start each day at 6.30, or within 30 minutes of 6.30. This means from 6.15 to 6.45, or 6.30 to 7.
A consistent wake time helps to move towards sleeping through the night.
Baby Diary: Week 15
What a busy but beautiful week! Full of smiles and sleeps.
NURSING
Jamison is more social while feeding this week! He did seem to not eat as much at a feeding, coming off more often. Still taking about 20 minutes, 10 on one side, and 4-5 on other. I have been confused about how to do the 3.5 hour schedule without having to wake him twice at night. I have been topping him up and it seems to work ok. Night feed is normally 9.30 and this is great, better than 10.30 so I can go to bed!
NAPS
Naps started really well. I was having to wake him from about half his naps. I even made the mistake of thinking, "I think we might be past the times of short naps." HA! Don't ever think that. After a few days of disruptions (Christmas), it took him only a day to get back on track. Good few resettling attempts. Seems to go past the first 45 minute cycle every nap and sometimes continues for over 2 hours! First rest of the day can be unsettled. This nice napping was less common towards the end of the week, after a couple of days of the routine being slightly out.
WAKETIME LENGTH
Wake time lengths are at 1 hour and 10 minutes, sometimes 15 minutes. He does find it harder to settle if any longer, or shorter. Seems to sleep better with this extra time. Found his first wake time challenging some mornings when he has been awake since 5 or so. Likes to talk to himself at this ungodly hour!
Jamison doesn’t seem to have an ‘arsenic’ hour or time of the day where he is grumpy. He did have a couple of times where he cried heartily and was quite distressed in the morning, but it was usually followed by a mighty big poo! This pattern continued all week - one or two settled mornings, then a very unsettled one, followed by a poo explosion!
NIGHTTIME
Jamison went back to waking early in the morning. I would feed him from one side only and then put him back to bed. By the end of the week, he had woken at the same time around 4 am for a good few nights in a row.Now this seems to be settling down and he is not feeding until 6.30 or 7.
MILESTONES
Jamison is really reaching for his toys and is more coordinated in his putting them to his mouth, although he often sucks his hands rather than the toy! Really strains to crawl, lifting bottom and legs off the floor. He will move if something is placed behind his feet. Likes to almost pivot on his mat. Lifting head and chest with ease and looking around.
Seems much more aware of us around him and tracks us around the room with ease. Talking more and making squealing noises.
WAKING HAPPY
Jamison wakes happy from most of his naps that are longer than one sleep cycle. Will flap hands and kick legs in excitement when he sees me and gets picked up. Will cry if he hasn’t had long enough, or has taken ages to resettle. I read that if your baby isn't doing this by this age, not to panic. Babywise says baby starts to wake up happy around 5 months.
SWADDLING
We are still swaddling. I am, however, closely watching and monitoring for the time to stop. At times I will wrap him more loosely, so that he gets the point that it is rest time.
Sometimes we have one arm out. I do notice though that he settles to sleep quicker if he is tightly wrapped. The wrap has been very saturated this week from him sucking on it!
I don't think there is any rush to drop the swaddle. Some moms swaddle up until a year old! I do want to drop it as soon as he is ready for it, but I am not going to drop it until we can do so without causing problems to sleep. One exception I would make for this rule is if he started to roll from front to back while swaddled. It would then become a potentially dangerous situation to be swaddled and I would stop the swaddle to maintain safety.
Jamison has been in a sleeping bag over night for a few weeks now. I am not using it during the day until he sleeps without the need to be pinned!
OUR SCHEDULE
6.30am feed
OUR SCHEDULE
6.30am feed
7.45 bed
10.00am feed
11.15 bed
1.30pm feed
2.45 bed
5.00pm feed, then play, then bath
6.30 top up feed then straight to bed
9.30/10 dream feed
It has been very hard to keep to this for some days this week so it has been a bit out. Worked really well for the last couple of weeks, so will persist and then look at moving to 4 hourly.
OUTINGS/EVENTS
Christmas, my birthday. Lots of visiting etc. Jamison coped very well and recovered very quickly on Monday, sleeping 3 2hour naps with only 2 resettling with not much protest. Rest of the week was more unsettled, obviously catching up on us. Few days at home are in order I think!
OUTINGS/EVENTS
Christmas, my birthday. Lots of visiting etc. Jamison coped very well and recovered very quickly on Monday, sleeping 3 2hour naps with only 2 resettling with not much protest. Rest of the week was more unsettled, obviously catching up on us. Few days at home are in order I think!
The beginning of my musings!
Why Baby Babbles? Well since having my beautiful son 15 weeks ago, I have been recording my reflections, observations and memories of motherhood and my son (i.e. my 'babbles') in random journals, computer files and pieces of paper. Here I aim to record how things are going and to process my muddled thoughts, which do often come out like a baby babbles! Apart from providing me with a record of this special time of my life, I hope reading my posts will encourage and amuse other mums out there who just need to read that their child is not the only one doing what they are doing!
I am excited to record my new world as a Mother.
I am excited to record my new world as a Mother.
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